Friday 12 July 2013

PMT (Pardon My Tantrum)

I am writing this blog post from the safety of my PMT cave..............................................Once a month I will retreat to this emotional place and wait it out until it passes. My whole PMT nightmare begins about 4 days before lift off and progresses as follows.....

1. Hair -  suddenly takes on the limpness of a salad leaf that has been left out in the sun for a week.

2. Nails - Suddenly split, chip and break to leave me with unattractive stumps.

3. Eyes - Makeup slides off without me even knowing it to reveal piggy pee holes in the snow.

4. Skin- My once radiant skin now resembles a rhinos backside and requires double the amount of face cream.

5. Body- This is a particularly attractive side effect..............To cut a long story short........Jabba The Hut (Star Wars) has nothing on me when it comes to water retention.

6. Brain- I pride myself on being relatively intelligent (I said relatively), that is until PMT strikes........Forgetful, paranoid, jealous and just generally crazy are just a few of the symptoms that hit me. Mr DG doesn't stand a chance and any slight change in the way he looks at me results in me accusing him of all matter of things.

7. Mood- Hmmmmmmm.........................Where do I begin................................Glen Close(Fatal Attraction) crossed with The Woman In Black.......................Need I say more.............

8. Cravings- Anything that doesn't say "Less than 30g of fat". You know its here when you start adding chocolate chips to your soup.

It really is an utterly miserable time for us girls isn't it, Mr DG is very understanding and many men would of walked years ago but he continues to feed me chocolate and say nice things (except that time when he told me that it was called PMT due to Mad Cows Disease already being taken.........Lets just say, its a good job he can run quickly) of course I don't believe a word he is saying but the gesture is nice all the same. But lets face it, if men had periods the government would allocate funds to study it and there would be a bank holiday every 28 days for them.

I would love to hear how you tackle your PMT demons and any top tips would be gratefully welcomed. Failing that I am just going to consider building a PMT shed down the bottom of the garden for me and The Teenager to retreat to..................................It will of course be stocked with a supply of fattening foods, weepy movies and......................................................NO MIRRORS !!!

Anyway, I'm off to await the Menopause...........

Lots of PMT Love
Me
xxxxxx

16 comments:

  1. Pre-children I had terrible stomach cramps, but no PMT. Post-children its swapped - no cramps and horrible PMT. No cramps sounds like it would be wonderful, but it means I have no warning of my period starting so have to walk around with a towel in when I suspect it might come, so thats shit and the PMT is shit (although that might be the PMT talking because when it does everything is shit)

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    1. I feel so sorry for you, we women have to go through so much don't we. xx

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  2. I am so with you! My PMT has got worse as I have aged, and apparently it does, can get bad in your forties with the run up to the menopause - hormones everywhere, I get awful mood swings, paranoia, my skin looks like crap..... Last year I started taking anti-depressants, and they have helped, and I intend to stay on them until my periods have finally stopped - I just can't cope with my crappy hormones. That said I once tried a diet that cut out all sugar and wheat for over a month, and I have to say, that really improved things - barely had any PMS symptoms at all... I should really do that again. Sugar really is the enemy of mood swings and PMS and hormone levels. X.

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    1. I think you have a point about the sugar thing and lets face it...Its the only thing we really want around that time of the month xxx

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  3. I am so with you, my husband knows when to keep out the way :)

    thanks for sharing at the weekend blog hop :)

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  4. i can so relate to you, especially right now! grrrrrr...its the retention that drives me crazy, i feel like one day im just going to explode like a balloon whilst walking the dog!

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    1. Me too............Right now my feet look like a joke pair you get in a fancy dress shop xx

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  5. Poor you! I'm not affected like this at all. I get slightly angrier, but it's not really noticeable. Bank holidays every 28 days so nice though! ;)

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    1. You are so lucky, wouldn't a bank holiday be lovely once a month xx

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  6. Am so with you! I have some hormonal issues that mean my PMT or PMS makes me not fun to be around for 2-3 days a month. I literally felt like punching the man on the bus who stood on my toe (accidentally, he was terribly apologetic about it) and I'm normally fairly chilled about stuff like that. PMT makes me very grumpy and spotty and let's not talk about fluid retention.....
    I'm not sure what to suggest because I've tried and most things help a little but not much!

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    1. Oh no....that poor man......although he did stand on your toe to be fair and if happened to me around my time of the month I probably would of stamped on his back xx

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  7. Good post. ;)

    Another month and a half and I will officially be in the Menopause. It brings with it a whole new heap o' problems. Trust me.

    But I have suffered with PMT. And how!!

    Most of my arguments, tearful episodes, tantrums and minor car related incidents have occurred during my PMT phase.

    You have my sincere and heartfelt sympathies. I would hug you but it's waaaay too hot. So I will blow you a kiss instead. MWAH x

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    1. Poor you....I would hug you back but your so right.....Its soooo hot...Blowing a kiss back at you xxxx

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  8. You have my total sympathy! I think I actually scare my children when it's 'that time'. One minute totally calm and the next, very irritable! And I have no control over it either. My husband has learnt to stay well away from me when I'm like it!

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Love to hear your comments, and I will always try to reply xxx