Thursday, 13 March 2014

Think First, Speak Later

I recently had lunch with a dear friend of mine and a couple of her friends, we got onto the subject of things Men just shouldn't say to women no matter what the situation. This conversation stemmed from one of the ladies telling us that the night before her Husband had very stupidly asked her during an argument if she was on her period................................................................................................We all sat opened mouthed at his bravery as she retold how she had glared at him then burst into tears. Come on Men.........Its not that hard is it.......................................The golden rule is................................If your not sure don't ask, go out buy chocolate, wine and give her a cuddle.

Here is a list of 10 things you should never say to a woman.........On or off her period.

1. "Are you wearing that?" - This will result in an astonished look followed by 2 hours of changing outfits whilst screaming that she has nothing to wear. The right thing to say is "You look gorgeous".

2. "God, you sound like your Mother" - Response will consist of "The Look",

3. "So, what exactly have you done all day?" - REALLY!!! Are you even noticing the neat and tidy house with the pile of freshly done ironing hanging on a chair and the kids homework completed.......Never mind the fact she is drinking Gin straight from the bottle.

4. "For Gods sake chill out" - Never a good one, in my experience I find the person who says "Chill out" is probably the reason you are stressed in the first place.

5."I don't have any clean socks" -  That's because you roll them into little balls and stuff them down the sides of the chair. If you would like them washed please separate them and place them in the wash basket..............I repeat "IN" the wash basket not "ON TOP OF"

6. "Is it that time of the month?" - There is no answer for this one only that Bravery has taken over.

7. "I was so busy I didn't even get time to go for a swim and a sauna at lunchtime". - Boo Hoo.....She probably hasn't even had time to have a wee today.

8. "Crikey, are you going to eat all that?" - Not wanting to make a scene in a restaurant she will wait until you are in the car then.........I would duck if I was you.

9. "Don't worry, I love all your wobbly bits". - Our answer will be "When you look like Hugh Jackman, I will work on looking like a Victoria's Secret model.

10. "I'll drive......I'd like to get there in one piece." - Your journey is likely to be fraught and peppered with extreme back seat driving.

Take note fellas or face certain limitations...............

Next week Mr DG will be doing a guest post on 10 Things You Never Say To a Man.......................Its only fair I suppose.

Lots of Love
Me
xx

44 comments:

  1. Oh this cracked me up!!!!!!! SO funny and very true ;) x

    ReplyDelete
  2. *cries with laughter* so so true. The socks one happens ALL the time in my house with hubby and two teen boys........the 5 year old has started now too!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks Kara, why do they do it and then bloody moan about not having any x

      Delete
  3. Ooh this is SO hilarious * wipes tears away

    ReplyDelete
  4. hahaha!! Great post! Made me laugh out loud! So very true x

    ReplyDelete
  5. Hilarious! Luckily mine has never uttered any of those, except possibly the final one- but then I actually cant drive- so he has a valid reason for that!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. You are very lucky Sonya.....Hang on to him xxx

      Delete
  6. lol - so true! Great post :) made me laugh!

    ReplyDelete
  7. Brilliant! I look forward to next week's post!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks Angela......It should be a good one xx

      Delete
  8. Hehe love this. My OH recently asked me "you didn't go out in those did you?" referring to a pair of trousers I wore to work!!!!!! Err yes... Bastard lol x

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Oh no he didn't...............Thanks for reading xxx

      Delete
  9. This is great. I would add to the list "What's for dinner?" as if you don't walk into the house to a welcoming smell of something identifiable then that means it has been a very bad day and it is takeaway or a frozen meal and you can blooming well get it yourself! Thanks for making me chuckle x

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. That definitely should be number 11. xx

      Delete
  10. Ha ha ha well got to admit my hubby is guilty of 2, 3 and 9! He says I sound like his mother to make fun of me (not in a horrible way!) He often says what have you done all day, I'd like to see him clean and then watch the twins mess it up, bake and look after twins, he also says he love my wobbly bits which I know the twins kindly caused but he only says it to make me feel better! I did chuckle as I read this xx

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. My hubby says them and I know he pulls my leg now after 20 years. Thanks for reading hunny xx

      Delete
  11. This is hilarious! I am sure my hubby has said every single one of those at some point!! I'm looking forward to hearing the mens version!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. To be honest....I am looking forward to the mens version too....Will be very interesting xx

      Delete
  12. LOL!!! Love this!! I love your blog... I relate to almost everything you write!! :) xx

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Aww bless your heart Lucie, that's so nice to hear. Thanks for reading my lovely xxx

      Delete
  13. Oh yes 'What have you been doing all day?' is one that makes me RAGE!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. My answer is usually....."Plotting how to punish you for asking me what I have done all day". Thanks for reading me darling xx

      Delete
  14. So funny! Mine is well trained though and wouldn't dare say any of them! x

    ReplyDelete
  15. Ha mine does the "I haven't got any socks *helpless face*" thing - it does drive me mad! Why can't he just look for some himself???

    ReplyDelete
  16. OMG this is hilarious . Thanks x

    ReplyDelete
  17. I love these conversations between the ladies when we all get together!
    My fiance has used a few of those phases. sod.
    Cant wait for next weeks post!
    Love Model mummy x

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Its where I get most of my blog material from......Women on a roll drinking coffee are the best research xxx

      Delete
  18. I love no 5, my husband says that to me all the time!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. They are a nightmare aren't they. Thanks hunxx

      Delete
  19. If there's one way to make me angry, it's to tell me to calm down x

    ReplyDelete
  20. haha, this made me giggle!
    It's all so very true :')

    xxx

    ReplyDelete
  21. No. 4 - oh yes, ain't that the truth? ;)
    The other one I HATE is "Cheer up love, it might never happen!" Um, actually, it already has and you ARE NOT helping...
    x

    ReplyDelete
  22. ooh i hate being told to calm down! x

    ReplyDelete
  23. Oh, reading the title of your post is just like you wrote it just for me... I should really think more before I open my mouth sometimes

    ReplyDelete

Love to hear your comments, and I will always try to reply xxx